New Year…

So far 2014 hasn’t technically been going as planned. I am going on day 4 of being sick with the 3rd (and hopefully last) bout with the flu. This strain is no joke. I don’t mean to bitch and moan, but seriously, I wouldn’t wish this flu on my worst enemy. I have basically spent the last 4 days in bed..which is literally my version of HELL. I am a terrible sick person, because I don’t like to lay down and rest. Anyone who knows me can attest, I am sorta a lunatic, and pretty much constantly moving, or working, or whatever. I have an acceptable level of self diagnosed ADHD and if I can’t do at least 100 productive things in a day, I am generally disappointed. I sure hope I don’t pass this trait on to G.

Anyways, the point of this flu story is this……

You don’t really appreciate how lucky you are to feel healthy and have energy (read self diagnosed ADHD) until it’s taken away from you. Even if it is has only been for a few days, being glued to my bed has given me lots of thinkin’ time and has put lots of things into perspective.  I am not big on New Years resolutions mainly because I don’t like to fail, and I HATE setting goals I know I may not achieve. It gets me all pity party-ish and pretty much makes me want to quit at life. Its dramatic but its true..

This year I am going to break my rules and set some New Years resolutions. They are not going to be superficial things like loose the baby weight (4 years later), or things I know will never happen like join a book club and a become an expert at Karate. No friends I am setting moral goals. In 2014, I want to be a better person and I want to reconnect with my humanity (que the cinematic orchestra)

I guess that’s a little vague and slightly OTT, so let me elaborate.

If I am honest, in fact if we all are a bit honest, I would say I probably don’t do enough on a daily basis to better myself as a person or enjoy how blessed I am in life. I get so wrapped up in work, and day-to-day bull-shit, that I rarely take the time to realize that life exists past the tip of my own nose or outside my little world. I spend hours on the computer, hours in my car, hours and hours working and sadly not enough hours enjoying my life…because my life has become all about all the other shit.

Maybe this is my quarter life crisis, but at 32 years old, I feel like the last 10+ years have been about hurrying through each day. It’s weird. So many amazing things happen, but I just mentally rush through everything and can’t wait for the next..whatever it is.

well…it’s 2014 and the buck stops here.

I am going to stop and smell the roses more

I am going to loose my inhibitions

I am going to only do things that make me happy in my work life and stop saying yes to everything

I am going to trust my instincts and listen to my guts more

I am going to do more for other people 

I will be a better Mom and a better Wife

and I will make my physical and mental health a priority

Also, and quite importantly, I want to connect more with anyone and everyone who spends any amount of their day coming to this place to read my thoughts or view my work. I owe lots in my life to this blog and you lovers who keep coming back. I am quite clearly craving some more human interaction outside my bubble, so I am planning on showing more appreciation.

simple.

Well thanks for letting me emote this fine Monday morning and keep it real with y’all…

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